The Three Rules of Lesser Golf

This is a picture of what not to do: We stay out of heavily populated areas, public recreational spaces and sacred places or anywhere that is ornamentally landscaped or for urban agriculture. We don't use golf balls. I don't know WTF is wrong with this crew... this is in a cemetery.

Well, I’ve taken a bit of time off from the GHLG blog.  The blame falls on me having to pay for food and thus requires that I work…or hunt.  I don’t get out to my cottage much and the pigeons of Halifax probably are not as tasty as they look so continuing to work seems like a plan.  No Friday night golf last night because I went to see a stellar show that included MEGASOID, a crew that I know through work of their members really understand city living and the joys it can bring.

Last night I hitround a bit in the early morning before breakfast and it really set me up for whats was a fun day of meetings with politico types and a creative agency.  There is something wonderful about the way that things have been going with GHLG; I had some friends head out at my urging (read: badgering) in Toronto and they loved it.  I will hitround with them next month.  They should take the time to bring a camera and send us some pics to post…

What I have felt more than anything else people seem to taken to the rules.  One person went as far as to say they are rules to live by.  I prefer to not attribute doctrinal status to a code created to keep loafers out of trouble.

The three rules are simple: 1) Have respect; 2) Everybody sucks; and 3) Don’t be a control freak.  These were adopted from other swinging crews, and served simultaneously self-interest and community good.

1) Respect

Respect can be sweet and soulful

Really, like anything, if we had one rule and it was respect you wouldn’t need any other rules.  Sure people get off on the idea of compassion as a guiding principle for humanity into the future but respect seems to be a better for now, and more realistic rule for general stability and resilience.  Love ins come later; but I digress.

This rule has already kept us out of trouble.  It has made sure we haven’t broken anything and gives us a nice break during traffic to scope or get to know our fellow swingers.  It also kept BB from getting lippy with the half dozen Commissionaires and 3 cop cars that helped us find an open coffee shop after surrounding us as we golfed down through a parking garage.

But in general is protects the public and it protects the opportunity for us to continue to play, keeps other from getting a bad rap so others they can take up the clubs on their own without slipping on our residuals.  We also, for this reason try to avoid pocket parks and spaces that our presence might get in the way of people’s enjoying a common space.

2) You suck

Man compares balls with a lard based dessert

You suck is both a rule and the truth.

First golf clubs are ill suited to hitnround tennis balls.  You either pop them up or punch them…you duff a whole bunch of shots and that is most of the fun.  Embrace the fact that you suck and you stop working about being good and you just end up enjoying the journey.  This is something that has actually transferred to my life which needed to embrace more of a slower ethic to it.

In another way this is really a way of keeping it from being exclusive.  People can’t use the excuse that they suck to not come play; in fact it compels them to.  People who take the time to practice are taking it way too seriously and should probably join a country club and talk about their handicap… we will do likewise about them.

It is a fact of life you can’t control the bad things you can only do your best.  As my buddy J.J.MacKay’s dad Big Lou once said to me: life gets no easier, you just get better at handling it.

3) Don’t be a control Freak

Fact: Napoleon was such self-centred control freak he crowned himself Emperor. Fact: Douche is a French word.

No body wants to hang with with people who are control freaks.  Something that takes a while to learn for lots of people. Control is an illusion.  So if you’re the Napoleon type golf yourself home and crown yourself king of a pass-time that nobody keeps score most of the time.

This rule keeps people out of each other’s grills; and so that everyone can have a relaxed time choose their own path, judge their progress as they see fit and makes them most content.

These rules were set up as making the our nights hitnround safe and positive; inclusive and chill and free for us to enjoy as we feel best suits us.

We use them for urban golf but apply them as you see fit.

Respect: P

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